"it" just moved
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
Dramatic love triangle! I guess mystery Asian and I will just have to fight it out for your love.
Also when i was high i would close my eyes and see a puppy on a grill having pancake batter poured on it.... And for whatever reason it was fucking hilarious.
sex in a hospital.. check
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
I woke up at 6 and was laying at the top of my stairs.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
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