Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
Dude in front of me just jumped out of line at Starbucks to go puke. Vegas in prime form.
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I woke up half naked on the floor next to his bed, and his cat was staring at me like it had seen everything that i myself don't remember..
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
Randomize
