That's intense
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
Nothing better then your mother meeting someone you randomly had sex with and him introducing himself as the guy who rocked her world once.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Dude, double fisting packs of Ramen saved my life last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
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