so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
That was like a fiery explosion of flailing arms and wonderful passion
First sunburned tits of the season. And it's only April... I feel like it's going to be a good summer.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
