turns out Discover card thinks that if you spend $450 at four different liquor stores in one evening that the card "must have been stolen"
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
I will not ride trays down a flight of stairs topless and drunk....
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sat in the bathtub with the shower running so I could eat the whole box of mega stuffed Oreos. What am I doing with my life
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
You start to question your party girl tendencies when you're wearing the same shirt you wore the night before to work and you're trying to get last nights Jell-O shot off the sleeve on your way to work
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
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