Hey I found your number in my phone i dont remember how we met this is richard btw
strange i dont have your number must have been a drunk thing
could be more
absolutely not
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
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