Heyy I kind of wanted to apologize and excuse myself for last night. I feel like that was a little much. I just met you. That's why I don't like tequila. Haha
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
Wait does semen show up on blood tests?
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
What is your life?
A tangled mess of finals and bad decisions.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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