would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I am about to be in my happy place. (the shower with a 6 pack)
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
He's Hawaiian. Thank god it wasnt a real American
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
They are going to name an STD after you.
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
Aiming to get laid tonight but if it falls thru I'm either gonna make a mixtape for my sugar daddy or sew a teddy bear for his newborn
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
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