fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
Can you send me the video of that girl that got arrested last night? I'm gonna try and hit that and I need something to break the ice with.
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
facebook is just a cold reminder of all the times other bitches won my hookups
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
All because of that GODDAMNED MIKE PENCE.
Randomize
