i told her that she could bring as many friends as she wanted and then she asked how many people i could fit in my bed...BEST. DAY. EVERRRR.
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
