He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
We're not in high school anymore. I'm not going to pretend to be impressed as he butchers my favorite songs on his guitar. I just wanted to get laid.
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
My favourite part was when you contorted upside down in the tub and said "I don't want to be upside down"
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