I think she would actually eat a penis if anyone was brave enough to let one near her mouth
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
You are such a cockblock sometimes
You NEED a cockblock sometimes
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
I stole $10 from the guy I hooked up with last night.Not sure why but it was definitely more satisfying.
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