Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
woke up this morning to find the entire staircase covered in marinara sauce, with my roommate practically sobbing and scrubbing the wall with carpet cleaner.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
This is how baked we were last night. Our drinking game: We stare at each other; first one to laugh drinks.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
last night we watched this really loud chick try and pick up this smoking french guy who's english was sooo bad. she finally pointed at her beer and then her vagine
gross
like you've never done an interperative dance for sex, please
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
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