i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I do wanna see you. And we can just lay here and watch a movie and listen to me cry.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
Randomize
