why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
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then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
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Took his shirt off. Announced he was Jesus. Threw up. Asked me to cuddle him to sleep. And then tried to kiss me. Typical Saturday night.
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
When they said they were gonna tattoo each other's gamer tags on their asses, I knew I no longer had a boyfriend.
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