nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
Hangover Status: I've been bedridden longer than that kid from The Secret Garden. It's not looking good.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
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