i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
Please tell me I didn't pass out while we were having sex last night... and if so I am sooooo sorry.
I think I'm going to start texting all the people that don't want to talk to me
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
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i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
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He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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