You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
I am choosing my outfit based on how fast I can get it off. Please help.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
you left me with this keg alone. this is on your hands
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
Randomize
