i don't plan on having that self control this summer
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
We videoed ourselves having sex... I now know why I close my eyes during sex
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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