she gave me a schnouzer then wanted to kiss while we were having sex...i had to puppy slap her nose. pick me up out front.
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
So much for the toy store...Not a butt plug in the entire place. See you tonight.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Dude get here. I just re-invented nachos. For real though. They werent real before right now
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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