what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
