The bird has been looking kind of ugly lately...gotta look nice to fly with the hawk ya know?
"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
How can it be called memorial day weekend....I don't even remember this weekend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
Bonus points if the penis has a little hat too
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
My boss is explaining why he thinks time goes by faster and faster. Bc of the rockets. No lie.
if being 21 means slamming 99 cent margaritas at 3:00 in the afternoon on a Tuesday then call me Peter Pan IM NEVER GROWING UP
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