Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
Just considered playing a drinking game with powerade with my sister so she would get some fluids in her. I do so well with sick people.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
