and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
I walked in on a circlejerk after punching that guy out. Instant karma.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Dude, my back STILL hurts from carrying the team on BP last night.
Randomize
