shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
i think i swapped my keys for drugs last night
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
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