real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
Is sexting at a funeral morally wrong?
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
You challenged yourself to walk backwards all the way to the bar... And you did
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
Yes. We drank 3/4 of a handle of vodka, fried and ate a 3lb package of bacon, I tackled the neighbors snowman, made snow angels in our underwear, and then fucked all night. Christmas success.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
You should be glad you didn't come with last night. I watched pirate porn for the first time in my life as the 9th wheel.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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