i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
"Morning after" poops are always like, interesting.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
If she were to ever cheat on her husband, I'm positive I'm the the go to guy. Which flatters me and weirds me out at the same time.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
