The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Just stole a pregnancy test from Wegmans because I didn't want to pay 13 dollars to find out my life is over.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
Either I'm paranoid or I swear my parents rigged my house so you can never sneak in or have the munchies without being loud.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
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