I don't usually arrange sex via text message
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
how was your day?
fuck the small talk. are you bringing the liquor tonight or am i?
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
VODKA 4LOKO BEER NOT IN THE CLEAR
23 Gruesome Scientific Facts That Will Make You Squirm
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Friends don't brand friends with cigars. It's not how it works.
We can't go back there. Ever. No context required, just know it's true.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me