OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I'm drunk still and I cried and now I'm watching Whitney Houston singing the national anthem and I'm crying more
my vagina can't handle any more of our 4 day long smash bash. it should be like a holiday or something. should only happen once a year.
Randomize
