I love sluts.
I end my prayers with that every single night.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
Rolled in at 3:30am from the strip club, with all the screaming I did, Siri doesn't even recognize my voice this morning,
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize