normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
The worst decision I made last night was allowing myself to be duct taped to the ceiling
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
SHE BROUGHT HER PARROT TO THE PARTY. IT SQUAWKS EVERY TIME SOMEONE VOMITS LIKE 'PARTY FOUL SQUAWKKKKKK'
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
I'm so poor. I just wiped my ass with cocktail napkins... That I stole from the neighbors... When I was over there stealing Cheetos.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.