another moral hangover. fuck.
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
There's a good chance a guy sucked off my right earring last night
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
I've spent so much time on tinder lately I just tried to left swipe an instagram photo of my neighbor
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
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