True but thats because hes a fetus.
How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I'm glad we're going to catch up. too bad it's over my vagina.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
You gave me a bottle of tequila and introduced me to a ginger named cowboy. I actually love you.
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
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