I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
You'd think if the campus holds 28,000 undergrad I wouldn't run into three people I've hooked up with in one day
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
im at work. we just had a random 14-year-old amish girl come in and gift us with cinnamon rolls as thanks for letting her use the bathroom. i dont even know.
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
I can't believe I forgot to wish you a happy 13 week-iversary of the time you raw-dogged a rando. Only two days late, so it still counts. And since your 14 weeks is coming up, you should know that at 14 weeks your baby can squint, frown, grimace, pee, and possibly suck his/her/their/zir thumb!
The cop said he like my hair today. Please explain all other interactions with law enforcement, k thanks
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
is it fun? or sober?
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
