My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
In the midst of you puking your guts out, you stopped, looked at the globe in front of you and whispered "America.."
Don't ask me how, but I have a squirrel in my backpack and I don't know what to do with it.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I'll be back in a hour going with Jason to get his nipples tattooed back on again
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
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