you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Beer and xanax may be a bad combo, but I don't really care due to the beer and the xanax.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
Randomize
