Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I literally wonder, frequently, "Will anyone ever fuck me until i go cross eyed for 2 hours again?''
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Some girls wake up to good morning texts. I wake up to pictures of an angry Shrek getting a blowjob.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
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