Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
Eating alone in the dark with one candle. This is sorta sad.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
So I just got drugs from a house with a giant cross on it. Thank you, Jesus.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Found an elderly homeless guy with a Gandalf beard passed out on my porch. I put a Santa hat over his erect dick cause he was naked.
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
