Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
I never thought I'd end up with a prison pen pal through tinder
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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