i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
just got carried INTO the bar by 4 people. it's like watching my weekend in reverse.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
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