Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
I got a lot accomplished today, and the day is still young! I built a fort, hot boxed a fort, had a tea party in a fort, and now realizing how high I am.
Dude, I just cut my asshole on the new toilet paper. If you rationed the grocery money to buy drugs, I better be getting some.
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
An there's a little girl across the bar eating Mac n cheese... #1 she won't stop looking at me. Boo bitch I'm drinking alone. #2 I'm about to tackle her ass for that Mac n cheese.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
Then you shook your fists at the sky and explained to us that losing a sneeze is like losing an orgasm
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
he didn't stitch me up last time. in fact, he yelled at me for bleeding.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
