you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
I feel like hell. The amount of black beans I found in my hair tells me I hit rock bottom
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Mixing coffee with vodka may have been a bad choice, I feel like I'm pregnant and the baby is trying to perform a c-section from the inside.
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
I was about to google "rabies and sexual activity." Then I realized I was at work.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
Randomize
