Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
I'm gonna get drunk and through up on the first happy couple I see.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Do you remember what happened last night? All I could find we're phone numbers of strip clubs in Detroit. Did we go to Detroit?
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Randomize
