never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
I love girls that fake tan. Can you say p p p p p p p p pumpkin face
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
I need to do something profound in the next three and a half years so that when my kids ask what I did in my twenties I have something to say other than "made bad decisions"
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Pretty good. Thinking about getting day drunk and filling out job applications so I don't hate myself as much
What happened last night?
Lets just say you asked me a couple times if you had eyeballs..
Randomize
