i just turned barefoot contessa into a drinking game. everytime she uses a knife butter or salt i drink.
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
I passed out with my wizard stick taped to my hands and got woken up being poked with a St. Bernard
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
My favorite bartender added me on Facebook. Now he can clearly see how under 21 I am
I got head this morning from the 31-year-old version of Jenn. It was like a blow job from the future while a simultaneous blast from the past for 10 minutes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
I've never had someone so bad at kissing. It was like he was trying to block my airway with his tongue and he succeeded...
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
Randomize