i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her hair smelled like a rat dipped in mustard on fire
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
im just sayin im driving an hr to pick her up, just cause shes your gf doesnt mean i shouldnt be entitled to a bj
Jesus told me in my dream not to go to the party. I am athiest for tonight PARTY ON
We left the knife in your bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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