Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
Yo, go checkout Kerri's Instagram quick! There's like 12 pics of her fucking some guy in a bar's bathroom. GO GO GO GO!!!!
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
When you make me feel sane and well-adjusted, it is time to reevaluate your night out habits. Just sayin'.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize