Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
Circle jerk is a real thing. It looks like five innocent virgins in a closet at my brother's bar mitzvah. Yeah, I walked in on that.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
I mean, you have to swipe right on someone you had sex with last week though, right?
Morning! Im using your rent money to snort percocet.
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Randomize
