maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
It's a pity Stephen Hawking can't do sarcasm.
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
You don't have to be drunk! I've licked your asshole before
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I'm not up by 8, will you please knock on my door?
That depends, can you stop texting me while you're masturbating?
Touche.
I CAN STILL HEAR YOUR VIBRATOR.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
See? I told you no boy in roller skates could be entirely straight.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Totally just railed SuperGirl for my birthday. Best Girlfriend EVER!
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
Randomize