New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I think hes settled down now. He's just licking the walls and the windows.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
He thought I was flirting with him but really I just needed someone to hold me up.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
This is why we can never be together. Well that and we r married to other ppl but that's very minor detail compared to the coffee issue
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
You told everybody that you were a dragon and then projectile vomited all over the kitchen.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Randomize
